


you’ve changed me, but you will never know

by cinnamonstickrayofsunlight



Category: Julie and The Phantoms (TV 2020)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Everyone Is Alive, Fluff, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-11
Updated: 2021-03-17
Packaged: 2021-03-18 08:55:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,387
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29980440
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cinnamonstickrayofsunlight/pseuds/cinnamonstickrayofsunlight
Summary: there was a blindly bright sheet of paper at the end of the hallway, and alex was worried.-everyone is alive au, they’re doing their school’s production of theory of relativity!
Relationships: Alex Mercer/Willie (Julie and The Phantoms), Flynn/Carrie Wilson, Julie Molina/Luke Patterson
Comments: 3
Kudos: 19





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> this is entirely me projecting my theater nerdiness onto the jatp characters!!
> 
> no prior knowledge of the show is required, but listening to apples and oranges will make it make more sense!
> 
> trigger warning: swearing!!
> 
> title of the fic is from you will never know, from theory of relativity

there was a blindly bright sheet of paper at the end of the hallway, and alex was worried.

“he’s pacing again.” reggie said.

“dude, i can hear your thoughts from here,” luke said, “we could go over there and look for you.”

“no, i can do it, just give me a minute.” alex said.

“do you want us to wait for you?” bobby asked.

“go ahead, i’ll follow you guys.” alex said, and the boys went to go look at the sheet.

he watched as his friends walked the remaining length of the hallway. he watched as they stopped to look, and almost immediately after, they started jumping and yelling.

alex sighed, and followed his friends. as he reached the end of the hallway luke waved his arms and yelled, “dude! look at this!”

the sheet simply read “callbacks” with a list of names. alex glanced at where reggie had aggressively tapped the sheet, looking for his name. 

he found it, sandwiched between “bobby wilson” and “julie molina”

“dude!” alex yelled in response, and joined his friends in excitedly jumping around.

“excuse me?” a voice said from outside their group, “can we look at the sheet?”

alex and the boys parted to make room for a girl with large curls, clutching the hand of her friend, a person with long braids.

she spent a moment considering the paper, and then turned to her friend, “we got callbacks!!”

“you guys too?” luke asked, and when they nodded, reggie held his hand up to them for high fives.

“i’m julie, this is flynn,” she said, and gave a little wave to everyone.

“i’m alex,” he said, then he pointed to his friends, “this is bobby, reggie, and luke.”

the bell rang, and the large group parted ways. 

“see you tonight!” reggie yelled from down the hallway, and flynn responded with an equally loud goodbye.

-

a small group had assembled outside of the auditorium: alex, who had arrived with reggie and watched them all show up, took a mental count.

there was alex, reggie, luke, and bobby, obviously. the other two of them had showed up within minutes of the first, surprisingly on time.

next, bobby’s sister carrie and her friend kayla showed up, and quickly moved to the corner, talking to each other.

third, julie and flynn, this time with nick, carrie’s ex boyfriend. alex watched as they made awkward eye contact, before flynn had coughed something that sounded similar to “demon”, causing a discussion within their group.

lastly, there was willie, who had shown up separately from the other groups, but fist bumped flynn, and was brought into their conversation.

luke, who had watched alex stare, lightly elbowed him in the side. 

“ooooh” he said, before alex smacked him softly on the head.

his group was engaged in a discussion involving waffles? octopi? alex wasn’t actually sure.

“hey, hello, you awake?” bobby asked, and alex blinked, slowly.

“yeah, just nervous,” he responded.

then, mrs. harrison opened the auditorium doors, carrying stacks of paper.

“can someone help me pass these out?” mrs. harrison asked, “each packet is specific to you, it has excerpts from the various roles you received a callback for.”

julie, who had volunteered to help out, handed alex his packet. he opened it, and looked through the different songs.

reggie stuck his head over alex’s shoulder, and he stared at alex’s packet.

“what characters did you get?” he asked.

“hmm,” alex said, checking his list, “oliver, ryan, anthony, mike, and adam, you?”

“nice! i got oliver, ryan, paul, mike, and adam!”

mrs. harrison clapped her hands, and everyone looked up, “everyone up for sara and jenny are going first, i’ll give you about five minutes to get a listen to the measures i marked. everyone for adam, you have about twenty minutes.”

“do you guys have adam?” luke asked.

“i do,” bobby said, and reggie and luke agreed.

“fuck,” luke said, “willie! do you have adam on your list?”

willie cupped his hands like a megaphone, and yelled back, “no i don’t!”

“hell yeah!” luke said, and mrs. harrison gave him a sharp look.

“mr. patterson, language” she said, and reggie laughed.

“everyone for sara and jenny, follow me,” mrs. harrison said, and alex watched as julie, flynn, carrie, and kayla walked into the auditorium, following mrs. harrison.

-

julie squeezed flynn’s hand, and the two made their way into the auditorium. 

mrs. harrison motioned for them to sit, and she sat back on the stage.

“in your packets i marked measures 109 to 121! it’s the end of the song, you’ve just told this story about a tumultuous friendship, and it’s just come to an end!” mrs. harrison said.

“we’ll review each part, and then you’ll each try playing both sara and jenny with other cast mates,” mrs. harrison finished.

julie stood next to the piano with flynn, and mrs. harrison sat at the piano, playing each part for them.

then, her teacher made a list of pairs that would perform for the callback.

the order was: kayla and flynn, kayla and julie, kayla and carrie, flynn and julie, julie and carrie, and lastly, flynn and carrie. 

julie watched as kayla and flynn tried to navigate the end of the song. she felt bad, that they had to go first, and she definitely didn’t appreciate the little noises carrie made as she observed.

“good job you two!” mrs harrison said, “i know this is just a callback, but try to find a layer of the song that you connect with, that will help you really succeed.”

next, julie went up with kayla, and performed the 12 bars. it was less organic than she would’ve liked, but julie figured that was just a lack of chemistry with kayla.

julie stepped back and watched as kayla and carrie performed together, it was good, but that was as far as she cared.

she and flynn stepped up for their performance, and in her opinion, it went well. the two of them were amazing duet partners, even if the song was about losing a friend.

next, julie sang with carrie. it was good, but uncomfortably real, and she noticed carrie’s expression wobbling after the song was over.

lastly, flynn performed with carrie. julie laughed as flynn begrudgingly made her way to stand next to carrie, but stopped when the singing began.

it was even more uncomfortable and real than the last performance, julie thought, and when flynn made eye contact with her, she could tell they were thinking the same thing.

before mrs. harrison could give her last notes, carrie took a deep breath and said, “can i step out?” but didn’t wait for an answer, and left.

after the notes were given, mrs. harrison led them out the door, and called the adams in.

-

alex felt more and more sluggish as callbacks went on. out of nervousness, he separated each song, and didn’t look at them unless he had to.

when mrs. harrison announced that after the pauls performed, there would be a dinner break.

julie walked over to where alex was sitting with her phone out.

“what kind of pizza do you and the guys like?”

“um, pepperoni, why?” alex asked.

“my dad is getting pizza because flynn and i didn’t know to bring dinner, and i figured other people didn’t either?” julie said.

“that’s really sweet julie, thanks,” alex said.

“it’s no problem! i-“ julie stopped as her phone buzzed, she frowned, then looked up apologetically at alex, “sorry, i’ll be back in a minute!”

-

in the middle of talking to alex, julie’s phone buzzed.

flynn <3: 🚨❗️carrie just said she wants to talk to us❗️🚨

“sorry, i’ll be back in a minute,” she said to alex, and made a beeline for flynn on the other side of the waiting area, who had carrie beside her.

flynn turned their back to carrie completely, facing julie, “after almost a year, someone wants to talk to us.”

julie faced carrie, “what do you want?”

“i just want to talk to you guys,” carrie said, and flynn mouthed the word demon.

“i’ll listen,” julie said, “but you need to hurry up, i have a pizza coming. flynn, you coming?”

“i guess,” flynn said, with an over exaggerated eye roll.

carrie led them to a cafeteria table and sat down. 

“i’m sorry,” carrie said, “i know i’ve been evil, and that song sort of thew it in my face. you two were my best friends, and i thanked you by being a jealous, petty bitch.”

carrie took a deep breath, “i know i can’t take all of that back, but i’d like to make it better.”

julie was stunned, and by flynn’s facial expression, she could tell they were too.

“i’d be up for being friends again,” julie said, and flynn looked at her, confused, “but you have to prove to us we can trust you again. you’ve been pretty horrible to us for a while, and an apology won’t fix it immediately.”

“i completely understand,” carrie said, “flynn?”

“i don’t know yet,” flynn said, “i need to think about it.”

“i understand that too, take your time. thanks for talking with me,” and with that, carrie stood up and walked back to the waiting area.

“that was weird as hell,” flynn said, “it actually sounded like she was sorry.”

“it was weird,” julie said.

“you do know that you don’t have to forgive her right away?” flynn said, “she’s been a literal demon, and i don’t want you to get hurt again if she takes it back.”

“i know, i just kind of missed her.”

“me too jules,” flynn said, grabbed julie’s hand, and squeezed.

“want to go back?” julie asked, flynn nodded, and they started their walk back to the waiting area.

-

the rest of the boys returned right before the pizza came back. they walked over to alex, and then watched as a delivery person handed julie molina three boxes of pizza.

julie handed one box to flynn to make carrying easier, and as she did that, carrie passed the delivery person money.

by the time julie had turned back around, the pizza was paid for, and alex heard a “i got it” from carrie.

julie and flynn carried the pizza to the center of the room, where julie announced, “guys, i have the food!”

everyone started grabbing plates and forks, and reggie asked, “is this for all of us?”

“yeah it is!” she responded, and alex watched his eyes widen.

“you are my favorite person right now, sorry guys,” reggie said, luke pretended to frown, but they all piled slices on their plates.

the whole group ended up in a strange clump in the center of the room, eating pizza on the floor.

“did we ever do an introduction?” kayla asked, and the group shook their heads.

flynn smiled, “everyone: name, pronouns, favorite musical, and whoever is going next”

“i’ll go first,” flynn said, “flynn, she/they, legally blonde. i would literally kill to be elle,” she paused, “it’s willie’s turn.”

“thanks flynn,” willie said, and flynn gave them a fist bump. “willie, he/they, and the lightning thief. i was a percy jackson kid. julie?”

“julie, she/her, and hadestown,” julie said, “it’s just so beautiful, i love it. alex, do you want to go?”

“sure,” alex said, “alex, he/him, and bring it on, the choreography is super cool and i just really like it. luke, go.”

“luke, he/him, 35mm, i’m learning how to play good lady on the guitar, actually,” luke said, “reggie’s turn.”

“reggie, he/him, and oklahoma, but, the revival version,” reggie said. “bob, you’re going now.”

bobby said, “my name is bobby, pronouns are he/him, the last five years. go carrie.”

“carrie, she/her, waitress. nick?”

“nick, he/him, rent,” nick said “kayla!”

“kayla, she/her, six.”

the group broke off into smaller discussions, and after alex finished his slice of pizza, mrs. harrison exited the auditorium.

“everyone up for julie, you have five minutes. everyone for ryan and mike has twenty.”

the pizza was cleaned up, and everyone went back to their respective groups.

alex put on his headphones to try and get a grasp of the song.

as he listened, he very quickly realized that this song was most definitely not about apples and oranges. this was a song about being gay.

alex could have the chance to sing about something that made sense to him.

that his parents would see.

elbowing luke, he whispered “did you know about this?”

“yeah, dude. you didn’t?” luke responded, and alex’s eyes widened.

“some of us actually listen to the show before auditioning,” luke said, “but it’s fine. it took me like, ten listens to figure it out, and it’s not like your parents would get it, so you’re fine.”

eventually, mrs. harrison called them into the auditorium for apples and oranges.

mrs. harrison took her usual place at the front of the auditorium, “okay everyone, at this point you know the drill. we’ll review measures 75 to 90 a few times, and then it’ll be time to perform.”

after multiple performances, willie sat in the seat next to alex, “we’re up next,” they said.

“how do you know?”

“harrison has a giant list of everyone and it has the pairings on it, i looked before i performed last time,” willie said.

“okay, cool,” alex said.

“are you okay?” willie asked.

“i’m really nervous,” alex said.

“what kind of nervous?”

“um, usual audition nerves, also gay panic, but in the way that i’m both gay and panicking,” alex said, slightly regretting the tail end of that sentence.

“it’s okay dude, i get that,” willie said, “is there anything i can do to help?”

“not really?” alex said.

“is this okay?” willie asked, and grabbed alex’s hand, it was comforting.

“yeah, that’s really nice, thank you,” alex said.

soon, they were called to perform together, and alex hesitantly let go of willie’s hand.

when alex sang, this time, it felt less scary. he could literally pinpoint the story in his own life, and with willie singing next to him, the emotions weren’t as daunting.

as they walked offstage, willie squeezed his hand again, but let go.

when they were all finished, the group filtered out of the auditorium, and mrs. harrison thanked them for “fantastic callbacks”

“do you guys have rides?” julie asked.

“we do,” luke said, “bobby’s driving us, we’re waiting for carrie.”

“i’m leaving right now, bye alex,” willie said, then he yelled, “bye guys!” and left the school.

luke mouthed, “oooh,” but didn’t say anything else.

“my dad is here! bye guys!” julie said, and she left with flynn, kayla left soon after.

when carrie came back, everyone got into bobby’s car.

“alex, dude, what was that?” luke asked.

“what was what?”

“you and willie, holding hands. are you dating?”

“what the hell? no, i was just nervous. he was just being nice,” alex said.

“normally, i would never insert myself into this conversation, but alex, that’s gay,” carrie said.

“you’re all ridiculous,” alex said.

“but we’re right,” luke said.

the car fell quiet, and alex hoped they were right.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> after a night over at bobby’s, alex was ready to get to school. the cast list would be up on the wall, and he wanted to know what he got.
> 
> and who he was with.
> 
> \- 
> 
> the cast list is released!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for all the love on the last chapter!!! this one is just pure fluff, i hope you all like it!!
> 
> trigger warnings: alex swears, but that’s it!!! if there’s anything else you want me to specify, let me know!!

after a night over at bobby’s, alex was ready to get to school. the cast list would be up on the wall, and he wanted to know what he got.

and who he was with.

bobby drove into the school parking lot and parked the car.

carrie mumbled something that sounded like “get me out of this car,” and left. alex and the guys waited for bobby to turn the car off, and then made their way inside. 

made their way was a nice phrasing, alex thought, when it was actually more like a stampede. luke entered the school building first and took off, heading for the cast list sheet.

reggie stopped to wave to julie and flynn, before pulling bobby down the stairs with him.

alex waited for julie and flynn, and slowly walked down the stairs with them.

“are you excited to see what you got?” julie asked, and alex nodded.

“i have a role that i want, like really want, but i don’t want to be disappointed if i don’t get it,” alex said.

“that’s me too,” flynn said as they reached the bottom of the stairs, “it’s hard trying to want something but not get your hopes up.”

“alex!” luke shouted from the other end of the hallway, “get down here!”

alex speeds up his pace, quick enough that he’ll get there before luke starts to yell again, but slow enough that julie and flynn won’t get confused.

when he reached luke, the group parted for him to read the sheet.

he followed down the list until he read “oliver - alex mercer” and took a step back, so that julie and flynn could read the list.

“did you get what you wanted?” flynn asked, and alex nodded.

“cool,” flynn said, and turned to find her name. 

“luke!” julie said, “you’re my fiancé now!” and luke blushed.

alex watched as flynn stared at the paper with an expression somewhere between horror and excitement, but didn’t say anything.

he heard steps behind him and turned to see who was coming to look.

willie.

they looked at the sheet, and then searched the area for alex.

“looks like you’re stuck with me,” he said.

“i am, and i’m not mad about it,” alex responded.

“see you at rehearsals, ‘lex,” they said and walked back up the stairs.

alex was almost completely sure he was bright red, and started his walk to class to avoid any conversation about willie.

-

as usual, reggie accompanied alex to rehearsal because they shared a final class.

he was telling alex, in detail, about a conversation he’d had that morning, but alex was more interested in what was going to happen when they reached the auditorium.

“bobby told me that i shouldn’t eat old limes to see if they’re crunchy,” reggie said, “but then i poked his face and he shut up, which was weird, but he stopped telling me that i shouldn’t eat them and looked really pretty, so i don’t care.”

“what the fuck,” alex said, “how did you get from talking about the math notes to crunchy limes?”

“i don’t know, that’s just how it went,” reggie said.

“wait we need to circle back to what you just said, bobby looked pretty?” alex asked.

“he did,” reggie said.

“you worry me, you really, really, worry me,” alex said.

“i think we’ve already covered that, alex, it’s rehearsal time now,” reggie said, and opened the auditorium door.

“i don’t even know how to respond to you sometimes,” alex said, and surveyed the people currently in the auditorium.

a small circle had formed onstage, with mrs. harrison standing up, reviewing something in a binder, and julie, luke, kayla, and willie, sitting in said circle.

willie slid over from where they were sitting, and patted the spot next to him, “alex! over here!”

“okay... i’m leaving,” alex said.

“it’s okay,” reggie said, “have fun coping with every day interactions from the guy you like without my hugs.”

“reggie i don’t ask for those hugs, and i definitely don’t need to recover from interactions with a crush that’s nonexistent,” alex said.

“do i need to get involved? or should we just watch this play out?” julie fake whispered.

“they just do this, you just kind of watch it happen,” luke fake whispered back.

the remaining cast members filtered into the auditorium, and mrs. harrison clapped her hands together.

“everyone sit down! please make your way to the circle so rehearsal can begin!” she said.

“these first few days, i want us to really hone in on in character interactions, and building of said characters,” mrs. harrison said, “i want you to know your character as well as you know yourself.”

alex shot willie a slightly panicked look, and in response, willie grabbed his hand.

“i also want you to get to know your cast mates, so over the next few days you’ll be interacting with them, as well as filling out your character building worksheets,” mrs. harrison continued.

“i don’t have many requirements for you today, just talk, and try and answer at least ten questions on the sheet for your character, and some cast mates! i’ll be at the table over there if you need me,” mrs. harrison finished, and walked over to her table.

the circle closed in, and soon the people in it were overlapping.

“so,” willie said, turning their face towards alex, “what’s your least favorite food?”

“huh?” alex asked.

“well the analysis sheet asks for our characters least favorite foods, i figured we should ask each other that question too,” willie responded.

“oh, that makes sense,” alex said, “it’s hot dogs,”

“is there a backstory to this?” willie asked.

“do you remember our middle school’s production of shrek jr?” alex asked.

“i remember not getting to see it, if that’s what you mean?” willie said, “i had already left when you guys did it.”

“yeah, that’s what i’m talking about,” alex said, “luke bought a pack of hot dogs on opening night, and i don’t know what was in them, but we all got really, really sick, like hospital sick.”

“holy shit,” willie said.

“we can laugh about it now, but i will never eat another hot dog again.” alex said, “what’s yours?”

“my story is not at all exciting,” willie said, “i just decided a long time ago that i would never eat a blueberry, ever again, and i just haven’t?”

“what do you have against blueberries?” alex asked.

“it doesn’t make sense how they can be blue, green, and purple, so i stopped eating them,” willie said, and alex started to laugh.

“that makes no sense, i love it,” he said, “okay it’s my turn to ask a question, if you won the lottery, what would you buy first?”

“every skateboard i’ve ever wanted, and enough stickers to cover them completely,” willie said, “you?”

“a huge house, for me and the guys,” alex said, “i’m not sure what else, i’d probably donate the rest? or put it in savings so we’re stable.”

“that’s really cool, dude,” willie said, “i think it’s really awesome how much you guys care about each other.”

“they’re basically my family, i’ve known and loved them forever, even if they’re kind of dumbasses,” alex said, vaguely gesturing to the other side of the stage where luke was dramatically draped across reggie, and bobby was trying to pull him off.

willie checked the sheet again and asked, “favorite color?”

alex smiled, “pink, definitely,”

“teal for me,” willie said, and alex smiled even wider.

“teal is my sister’s favorite,” he said, “she likes all shades of blue, but it was teal and turquoise for a really long time.”

“what’s her name?” willie asked.

“charlotte,” alex said, “do you have any siblings?”

“nope, it’s just me,” willie said, “caleb took me in, and technically there are people from his club in the house all the time, but no actual siblings.”

“his club?” alex asked.

“he runs this dinner theater called the hollywood ghost club?” willie said, “and he always has people over to plan shows, choreography, casting, all of that stuff.”

“that’s so cool,” alex said, “do you think you’re going to perform there?”

“i have,” willie said, “i’ve been in less as i’ve gotten older, but every so often he asks me to audition for something.”

“what is your best memory?” alex asked, as he read off of the sheet.

“i don’t know if i’ve had mine yet, to be honest,” willie said, “i’ve had a lot of happy, good, positive things happen, but none of them are the best.”

“what’s yours?” willie asked.

“i don’t think i’ve had mine either, but i know what it will be,” alex said, “either graduation, or performing at the orpheum, whichever one comes first.”

“the orpheum? like the theater?” willie asked.

“yeah,” alex said, “the guys and i figured out pretty early that performing was our thing, and then it just, became it’s own thing?”

“what do you mean?” willie asked.

“luke’s mom took us to beauty and the beast at the orpheum when we were tiny, and ever since then it’s been our goal. we’ve always performed in shows together, so the orpheum is the goal.”

“that’s incredible,” willie said, but before they could continue, mrs. harrison announced that rehearsals were over.

“sorry for ranting to you,” alex said, and willie squeezed his hand. belatedly, alex realized they’d been holding hands the entire time.

“i don’t mind it,” willie said, “when you start telling stories you get all out of your head? it’s adorable, and i like to hear you talk.”

willie let go of his hand, and asked, “can i have your number? if we’re going to be duet partners, we should probably have conversations like this more often.”

“umm, yeah, let me just,” alex paused, dug his phone out of his fanny pack, and handed it to willie, “put your number in.”

willie did that, said, “talk to you later, hot dog.” and left with their bag.

“dude!” alex said, and he heard willie giggle as they left the auditorium.

he took his phone back out to send willie a message.

alex: today was awesome, and im really glad we got to talk so much. see you tomorrow!

within minutes, willie had responded.

willie: no problem hot dog!  
willie: like i told you earlier, you’re stuck with me  
willie: i really like talking to you, and i hope we get to talk more tomorrow <3

alex liked the messages.

“so,” luke said as the group walked to bobby’s car, “are you going to explain that? or are you going to tell you me don’t have a crush on them again?”

“okay you’re right,” alex said, “but it’s not that big of a deal!”

“isn’t that what you said after callbacks? and look where we are now,” bobby said.

“i have never been so glad you’re dropping me off at my house,” alex said.

the car ride to alex’s house was short, and alex got out of the car quickly. he said goodbye to everyone, and entered his house, already excited for the next day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading!! the next chapter will be up near the end of next week!! meanwhile, my tumblr is @cinnamonstickrayofsunlight !!!

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading!! the next chapter will most likely be up at the end of next week!!!
> 
> my tumblr is @cinnamonstickrayofsunlight!! come say hi!!


End file.
